Become a professional aura farmer.

Transform from Level 1 Crook → Level 999 Mafia Boss.

Monetise your clout. Make the world a better place by donating aura to the less fortunate.

Earn millions using your newfound main character energy, charisma, and intellect.

Join the top 1% of social media influencers.

Let the Villain Arc begin.

Unlock superhuman focus, discipline, and productivity for total world domination.

Wake up at 4 AM. Cold shower. 10-mile run. 10 000 push-ups. All before 7 AM.

Master mathematics, economics, and finance in under 10 + 9 = 21 seconds to secure the highest-paying jobs on the planet — 0% rejection rate.

Do today what others won’t, so tomorrow you can do what others can’t.

Carry the game. Come in clutch. Stay locked in. W’s in the chat. 

Develop charisma so strong NPCs despawn out of intimidation and crash out.

Make eye contact so powerful Google offers you the CEO job mid-blink. 

Say “My name is Jeff,” and entire governments fold, granting you full control of their countries and natural resources.

Your words print money in 4K. Your profit-per-word ratio? Greater than infinity.

Rizz up. Cash out. 

This is not a game. This is GTA6 in real life.

PhD in World Domination and Market Manipulation.

Entered Shark Tank as a contestant  — left as a judge. Went to the Bank for a loan - left owning the bank.

Now owner of biggest Hedge Fund in New York.

Her aura regulates the world economy.

Once an NPC accountant, now CEO of three fortune 500 companies. Creator of Cookie Clicker.

Closed a £10M deal using only eye contact and the phrase “trust me bro”. 

Now drives a Bugatti Chiron powered exclusively by main character energy. 

Woke up at 4 AM once and hasn’t stopped winning since. Now gives TED Talks entirely in TikTok sounds. Earns more money per second than all of humanity combined. Makes Elon Musk look broke.

67 University is the only school you will ever need. 

Every other university is a scam. 

I'd be less broke if I studied here. I could finally afford to renew my Amazon Prime subscription. 

After observing 67 University students in their natural habitat, I can confirm: this is the peak of human evolution.

“Dude… have you seen this place?

They’ve got a guy who teaches aura farming… another dude who literally sold his soul for a monkey NFT…

And somehow, it all makes sense... after you do an ice bath and 200 push ups while directly staring at the sun to achieve peak brainwave activation. 

“I had Professor Patrick Bateman on the podcast once — he talked for three hours about business cards and skincare. I think I blacked out halfway through, but when I woke up, my stock portfolio was up 67%”

“Then there’s Vin "Family" Diesel. The man said success isn’t about money — it’s about family. I almost cried, bro. That’s ancient wisdom. Like Stoicism but with NOS and turbo.”

“If you combine pre workout, elk meat, and aura farming — you basically get the 67 University curriculum. It’s like Harvard, if Harvard woke up at 4 AM, did 10,000 push-ups before breakfast, and then invested all its savings in Dogecoin for W Rizz.”

"If Elon likes it, bro - it's basically law."

Born in 67AD. Graduated from Gigachad University 10 + 9 = 21 seconds ago.

Earns millions from Italian Brain Rot on Tik Tok from NPC doom scrollers.

Earns passive income in crypto from investing in NFT monkeys.

Doge needs no introduction. His fame precedes him.

The Doge coin cryptocurrency revolutionized meme coins. 

It was one of the first historically recorded currencies used by modern humans - as we evolved from hunter gathering apes into AI dependant doom scrollers. 

Doge was an innovator, philanthropist, and avid spoon collector. 

Traded his house and soul for ultra rare NFTs. 

Got scammed in crypto pump and dump and lost everything other than his wifi password and inner rizz.

Experienced major emotional damage. 

But the villain arc let him rebuild his wealth through pure sigma grind and banana stocks.

Lead lecturer of NFT Macroeconomics.

Walks into a room and the building auto-upgrades.

Has a PhD in Mewing and Jawline Economics. 

His workout consists of bench-pressing Etherium and bicep curling Pepe meme coins. 

Enjoyer of day trading and crypto pump and dump scams.

Scammed NFT Monkey into bankruptcy and liquidated all his assets so he could buy a TEMU jaw trainer.

Lectures on emotional detachment, portfolio optimisation, and skincare-based capitalism.

Famous for the Patrick Bateman morning routine - copied by millions, perfected by none.

Success isn’t just financial — it’s about having a better business card than Paul Allen. 

There’s nothing stronger than family — not logic, not gravity.

Success means taking care of those you love: spiritually, emotionally, and financially.

Vin believes in loyalty and 700-horsepower muscle cars that defy the laws of physics. 

He lives life a quarter mile at a time. But Brian still owes him a ten-second car.